a new leaf....

thats right... i said "a new leaf". at least thats what i hope i've turned. you see, i have been known for being a bit of a nonconformist, deviant, maverick, lone wolf..... ehh you get the idea! anywho, ever since my latest financial drought, i began to ponder what life would be like "if i only ____". i.e. saved money, set goals, worn a condom.... okay, the last one was just for shits but you know what i mean. so now i'm making the effort to be a responsible, upstanding citizen and you know what, that shit is stressful!!! i mean the way i see it, which is usually a sick and twisted form of reality, i like money as much as the next guy if not more but its kinda depressing thinking about what you have to do in order to obtain valuables just to be back where you were.... broke and wanting something else! now don't get it twisted, i'm not saying nothing is worth the effort, i'm referring to my being impulsive and how it needs to stop. like i said, i've had plenty of time to think about where i went wrong and hindsight is 20/20. so looking back made me realize that i'd reached financial stability and success that many people twice my age envied, but my impulsive splurging and want for more made me belittle my own accomplishments making it easier to piss away what i did have!!

monday i start a new profession and i think i have a pretty good idea of how i'm gonna handle myself.

i'll still be me but version 2.0.